Asperger’s Experiences & Personal Growth: Stephen’s Evolution

Navigating Autism Through Poetry

Stephen McHugh Episode 24

Embark on a poetic odyssey with me as I navigate the intricate landscape of autism through heartfelt verses. In this episode, join the journey through six captivating poems, each revealing a chapter of resilience, growth, and the power of unlocking potential. Explore the beauty of language, the rhythm of words, and the shared experiences that bridge the gap between a unique perspective and the wider world. From 'Courageous Try' to 'Unlocking Potential,' discover the profound connections that weave a narrative of inclusivity, understanding, and the ongoing pursuit of one's prime. Welcome to a world where every word carries the weight of a thousand emotions and the promise of hope. This is 'Verse & Vision: Navigating Autism Through Poetry.

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Thanks for listening. You can find me on my website stephensevolution.com, or on twitter here. You can sign up to receive news of new episodes when they're released here.


Artwork produced by Elena Designe
Music composed by Nela Ruiz

[Introduction Music]

Hi there, wonderful listeners, and welcome back to another episode of the Stephen’s Evolution podcast. I'm Stephen McHugh, your host. For those of you joining for the first time, I’m on the autism spectrum, and I make fortnightly episodes based on my lived experiences with autism. This particular episode is a poetic exploration through the lens of autism.  Before we immerse ourselves in the verses, I want to share a bit more with you, about my language journey.

During my younger days, I struggled with language, often interpreting it quite literally. Idioms and metaphors were like a secret code I found difficult to work out. This created a set of challenges in understanding the nuances of communication. However, over time, as my language skills improved and evolved, I felt a renewed  determination within me to explore the intricacies of language, including more complicated forms like idioms and metaphors.

What I found particularly about metaphors was their ability to draw connections between seemingly unrelated things, creating a tapestry of meaning beyond the surface. In the realm of poetry, the use of metaphors, for me, takes on a special significance. I found myself captivated by the rhythmic dance of words, noting the subtle rhyming on alternate lines, a symphony of language that echoed the evolving melody of my own understanding.

So, as we continue to journey into this episode, where I'll be sharing my own poems, pay attention to the metaphors that I’ve woven into the verses. Each metaphor is a bridge between my experiences and the wider world, a testament to the evolving relationship I have with language.

The Poems

Now, let's get stuck into metaphors, the rhythm of words, and the resonance of shared experiences. Join me on this poetic exploration through the autism lens.

I’ve divided my poems into distinct categories. I have 6 categories, and I’ve selected 1 poem from each category.  I’ve explored various settings, which has allowed me to delve into my autistic evolution from different angles. Each category represents a unique facet of my journey—be it the challenges I've faced, the triumphs I've celebrated, or the diverse landscapes of exploration. Poetry, for me, has become a powerful lens through which I navigate the intricacies of my experiences.

Much like the way I've always enjoyed looking at things from different angles, these poems I’ve written offer a multifaceted view of my autistic evolution. It's a journey through varied emotions, diverse settings, and the evolving landscapes of self-discovery. As we step into the realm of poetry, let's now get ready to embark together on this exploration, and appreciate the beauty that can unfold when things are viewed from different perspectives.

5:15 - 7:41.  I have 6 different categories, and I’ve selected 1 poem from each category. The first category is Journey Through Challenges and the poem I’ve selected is  Clouded Resonance. I’m going to read it for you now. 

Stuck in a cloud,

your call is still loud.

When the cloud does disappear,

may your path be crystal clear

Here, for me in 'Clouded Resonance,' the imagery of being stuck in a cloud without clear paths captures a significant aspect of my journey. It echoes the challenges I faced during my early days, where delays in language development created a foggy landscape, making it difficult for me to understand what I was being asked to do, or to apply new knowledge easily.

The line 'your call still loud' resonates with the varied degrees of support that were always available, acting as a beacon through the cloud itself. It mirrors the calls for varying degrees of assistance and understanding that were always available to me in my life. Despite the initial challenges, there was a persistent and supportive call guiding me through.

As the poem progresses, 'your call still loud' takes on a transformative meaning. With underlying improvements and ongoing support I had, the cloud gradually dissipates, much like the fog lifting to reveal clearer paths. The metaphorical journey described in 'Clouded Resonance' mirrors my own evolution, illustrating how over time, things became clearer and more navigable as the cloud of confusion dissipated.

7:46 - 10:15. The next category is Nature's Inspirations. The poem selected from this category  is New Hope Dawns. I’m going to read it now.

In the dawn, a new day is born.

May birds who sing, in the morning light,

symbolise a spring, futures so bright,

full of delight, with each new morn.

In the simplicity of 'New Hope Dawns,' the dawn symbolises a new beginning, a fresh start. For me, the light breaking through and the birds singing in the morning, represent a profound sign of hope on the horizon. For me, it can be a reassuring reminder that better things are on the way, much like the promise of a brighter future.

This connection to hope resonates with my experiences, particularly during challenging times, such as facing exam results. I recall moments when the initial setback of poor grades transformed into opportunities for improvements during resits. The dawn of a new day, with its light and the melody of singing birds, mirrors the optimism I held during difficult times like those—a reminder that setbacks can pave the way for greater success.

The mention of spring symbolising futures so bright in the poem itself, aligns with my perspective. Just as spring is a sign of longer and brighter days to come, it's a metaphorical sign that better things will unfold in the future. 'New Hope Dawns' for me, encapsulates the essence of resilience, renewal, and the unwavering belief in the promise of a better tomorrow.

10:19 - 14:26. The next category is ‘Reflections on Diversity’. The title of the poem from here is ‘Inclusion’s Plea’. 

Don’t leave us out in the cold.
Be bold, let warmth unfold.
Though we’re not exactly like gold,
In the dance of life, a chance to hold.
For autism, take a glance.
It can be a life with a wonderful dance.

In this particular poem, the verses, for me, echo a heartfelt call for inclusivity, urging others not to leave those with differences 'out in the cold.' The metaphor of warmth unfolding invites a bold embrace of diversity. This poem takes me back to a poignant memory when my piano playing, like a gentle dance, caught the attention of music students living next door.

During one evening, one of the students, a friendly young woman, intrigued by my musical abilities, invited me to share my passion—an embodiment of letting warmth unfold. It was a chance for connection and understanding, a good example breaking the cold barrier that may separate people with and without autism.

Fast forward to the present, where people, especially during festive seasons like Christmas, request demonstrations of my piano skills—an invitation to 'take a glance' into the wonderful dance that is a life with autism. This ongoing dialogue, these moments of shared appreciation, become examples of inclusivity and warmth advocated in 'Inclusion's Plea.' They showcase the potential for connection, understanding, and the beauty that unfolds when diverse experiences are embraced.

When I think about it now, this reminds me of something important. Following my diagnosis, it meant that appropriate measures could be put in place for me at my primary school, to support my needs as best they could.  

Following observations, the school was reassured they were doing a good job, and that things would work out for me over time. This was important when it came to a decision in supporting my position in mainstream education

In my late teens and into my 20s, as time progressed further, I began to learn and understand ways in how to converse with others, including improving my understanding of the viewpoints of others.

I can see links between the poem now here, this one and the one to come, ‘Unlocking Potential’,  in that I was allowed the chance to climb, grow and show some of my potential.  

14:31 - 18:19. The next poem is from the category, ‘Navigating Life's Paths’.  The title of it is ‘Unlocking Potential’. 

At first, my steps may be slow.

But having patience, watching me grow,

and allowing me time, you will see,

the strides I make, the real me.


Many challenges over time I face.

With patience, I can discover my unique pace.

Come and witness my journey unfold.

In time, my story will be told.


So please, allow me the chance to climb,

reach the peak, and show my prime.

For with understanding, one may find the key,

and unlock the potential within me.

In the verses of 'Unlocking Potential' from the 'Navigating Life's Paths' category, the imagery of slow steps and the call for patience captures a profound aspect of my journey. It's a reflection on the challenges I have faced due to language development delays, where understanding what I was being asked to do, along with applying new knowledge took me more time.

The line 'having patience, watching me grow' resonates with the transformative power of patience. In my case, it reflects the slower pace in achieving academic grades I was satisfied with and the unique way my brain processes information. The reluctance to speak until I could say words perfectly underscores the intricacies of my communication journey.

As the poem continues to unfold, it expresses the importance of allowing time for challenges to be overcome. The line 'With patience, I can discover my unique pace' becomes a rallying call for understanding the differences in the way I process information. ‘Witnessing this journey unfold’ is an invitation for others to grasp the nuances of my story over time.

The closing lines, 'allow me the chance to climb, reach the peak, and show my prime,' encapsulate the overarching theme of the poem, ‘with understanding, one may find the key to unlocking the potential within me.’ 

Over time, my vocabulary has expanded. This has enabled me to express myself more effectively and coherently, in both written and spoken forms. The 'Unlocking Potential' is, for me, a poignant exploration of the transformative power of patience, understanding, and the ongoing process of discovering and expressing one's true capabilities.

18:23 - 21:27. The next poem is ‘Courageous Try’, in the category ‘Resilience and Triumph’.

You may not have got many right.

But that doesn’t mean you’re not bright.

Try to remain strong.

Seek out other things to do,

a path where success may brew.

And it may not be long,

before you others are proud of you.

Here, in 'Courageous Try,' the verses reflect a time in my life when a low score in a reading test, just 9 out of 44, initially seemed like a setback. The poem encapsulates the essence of resilience and the important lesson that exams and tests are not the sole measures of one's capabilities.

This poem, for me,  is a reflection on the belief that a low score doesn't diminish one's brightness or potential. It's a call to remain strong, encouraging the exploration of alternative paths, where success is more likely to brew. For me, this journey involved discovering and showcasing my abilities in playing the piano, earning a place in an orchestra for a play, which was musical to a degree. This was an example of a testament to the diverse ways one can express their true capabilities.

Over time, I realised that personal projects, like delving into topics such as trees and music, both of which interested me greatly during junior school, provided a unique avenue to showcase my interests and capabilities. The school's flexibility in accommodating my needs and recognising that traditional assessments might not necessarily capture the full extent of my abilities was a pivotal realisation.

Later achievements, like passing my driving test, as well as showing my ability at French, served as affirmations that success can manifest in various forms. The way I see it,  'Courageous Try' is a celebration of resilience, personal growth, and the understanding that true abilities often find expression beyond the confines of standardised tests.

21:32 - 24:46. The 6th, and final poem is titled ‘Seeking Out A Star’, from the category, ‘Exploration and Discovery’.

It’s lift-off from base,
Up into the sky, so very high,
Upping the pace,
as we head into space.
Destination, the moon.

But the moon’s too soon!
Let’s reach for a star, so very far.
So sit tight and let’s rocket,
To a future of profit.

Here, in the poem, 'Seeking Out A Star,' the way I see it is the journey from base to sky symbolising personal growth and progress, mirroring my own underlying improvement. Initially aiming for the moon as a symbol of achievement, I realised 'the moon's too soon,' highlighting the importance of striving for loftier, more challenging objectives.

For me, pursuing challenging goals connects with instances of overcoming language and communication weaknesses, notably in work settings in the past, like taking phone messages and, more recently at the time of recording, communicating on a platform like eBay. This journey reflects part of a transition from challenges to utilising improved language skills for creative writing in my blog and podcast.

'Seeking Out A Star' captures both the literal and metaphorical journey, emphasising the vital role of overcoming personal weaknesses. The way I see the poem here is,  it mirrors my experiences of striving for improvement, embracing challenges, and using language skills for creativity and connection with a broader audience.

The metaphorical journey through space becomes a representation of life, where reaching for a distant star symbolises the pursuit of personal growth and fulfilment. 'Profit' extends beyond financial gains, embodying positive transformation and meaningful benefits.

As we metaphorically 'rocket' towards a future of profit, the poem invites you to join in the pursuit of positivity. 'Seeking Out A Star' encapsulates the essence of ambitious goals, personal growth, and the journey towards a more fulfilling future.

Interaction and Closing Thoughts 

24:51 - End

As I wrap up this poetic journey through the lens of autism, I want to extend an invitation to you. It is an opportunity to share your thoughts. Do these poems resonate with you? Have you encountered similar moments on your own journey? If you've expressed your experiences through poetry, or any other written form, I would like to hear from you.

Connecting with me is easy—whether it's through the contact form on my website stephensevolution.com, or via social media, including Twitter. You can find a link to me on Twitter at the footer of my website. I look forward to your thoughts, and your input could enrich the community that can be built here.

If you'd like to stay in the loop on newly released episodes, simply head to a link near to the footer of my website and just click on the link to sign up. You'll then be among the first to know about fresh content.

Any feedback you may provide, could be immensely valuable. Leaving a rating on platforms like Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podchaser, or Podcast Addict can make a significant impact. If you feel compelled, leaving a review is a powerful way to share your experience and help others on similar paths discover meaningful content.

This poetic journey, from 'Clouded Resonance' to 'Unlocking Potential,' has offered glimpses into my experiences, from overcoming setbacks in 'New Hope Dawns' to the triumphs of creative expression in 'Courageous Try.' 'Inclusion's Plea' resonates with the warmth of connection, and 'Seeking Out A Star' invites us all to strive for loftier goals. 'Unlocking Potential' is a reflection on the transformative power of patience and understanding.

These verses serve as windows into my journey, navigating life's paths and unlocking the potential within. I hope this poetic experience has provided insight, resonance, and a shared appreciation for the beauty of diverse journeys.

Thank you for listening to, and being a part of this conversation. Your thoughts and stories can be the heart of what we do together here. Until our next exploration, continue embracing the beauty in every step of your own unique journey.

Outro Music