New Discoveries with Unexpected Changes

Sometimes things in life, we will inevitably find that things don’t always go to plan. At first, I understand personally how disruptive that can feel. However, looking back, one thing I learned over time was, how unexpected moments like these can often carry something meaningful in ways I couldn’t have initially anticipated.

In this quiet follow-up to my last episode, I reflect on change, trust, and what it means to find clarity in your own time, especially as an autistic person when it comes to trying to learn and make peace with life’s bends and detours.

Thanks for listening. You can find me on my website stephensevolution.com, or on twitter here. You can sign up to receive news of new episodes when they're released here.


Artwork produced by Elena Designe
Music composed by Nela Ruiz

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome and Introduction
• 1:25 Unexpected Park Run Change
• 3:23 Things Happen for a Reason
• 5:43 Finding New Opportunities
• 8:58 Embracing Life's Unexpected Turns

Transcript

Stephen McHugh: 0:21

Hi there and welcome back to another episode of the Stephen's Evolution podcast. I'm Stephen McHugh, your host, and it is in this podcast where I talk about my lived experiences with autism, by aiming to bring them to life through metaphors. In my last episode, I talked about experiences linked to a metaphor 'Flowing along life's unexpected turns'. This was inspired by my birthday. This was an opportunity for me to look back on my journey so far.

Stephen McHugh: 1:12

In this episode, I want to continue with that idea, but what I'll be doing is, taking it in a slightly different direction. It's to do with unexpected changes, and how I manage to cope with them better from the view as an autistic person. These can be occasions when life doesn't quite go according to plan, and it is from this that I develop the belief that things happen for a reason.

Stephen McHugh: 1:56

I'm going to tell you a brief story of a recent event where an unexpected change happened. Events that where an unexpected change happened. It was in recent weeks, at the time of recording this, when I was looking forward to doing my park run at the weekend. I was looking forward to it, like I do every weekend. However, when I got there, that's when the plan all like fell apart, and sure enough it was difficult to take. There was also the disappointment of not being able to take part, and be part of the community there on that occasion. In years gone by, like many years ago, that would feel rather overwhelming. It would like throw my routine routine off course. However, over the years I've developed ways of coping better with unexpected changes, and there is one way that I look at it that helps me to feel better about unexpected changes. I can compare this to the river just bending towards something I could not yet see. When I think about it now, the way I look at the phrase 'Things happen for a reason', it can be like, for me a quiet reassurance that even when things don't go quite according to plan, I always retain hope that things can still have positive outcomes. Having lived life as an autistic person, there would be times many years ago when I would find unexpected changes changes very difficult. However, this new mindset that 'Things happen for a reason', this helps me to soften the edges of that resistance. It doesn't fix everything. It doesn't take away the disappointment of things not quite working out as you might have hoped, but what it does is, I find it can help me to flow with the change instead of just dwelling on it, dwelling on the disappointment of the plan not working out as I might have otherwise hoped.

Stephen McHugh: 5:11

In the recent park run that caused an overflow parking area to be closed, one way I looked at it, was to use it to help me plan better in the future about how to avoid such a scenario. I could arrive earlier to increase the chances of being able to park in the main car park of the park, where I normally do my park runs. Or, alternatively, I could seek out a different venue, and just leave to go to the different venue at an earlier time in order to help increase the chances of being able to park at the alternative venue that I may choose to go to. This all reminds me of a new event that caused me to seek an alternative venue to go to a park run because, well, at the time of recording this at the weekend just gone, the venue was unavailable for some other reason. At the alternative venue, what I managed to do was break my personal best compared to the venue the park that I've normally been going to. At this alternative venue, I would finish the course the 5k park run in just over a minute faster than I have ever done. This helps me to feel good about it all.

Stephen McHugh: 7:10

Back to the time when I couldn't I was unable to participate in the normal place that I go to, I decided to do my own 5k along a local canal, which worked out just fine. I discussed I talked about that in my previous episode. It's been all about finding a way to 'go with the flow', like going in whatever way nature may intend.

Stephen McHugh: 7:50

And now what I want to do is invite you to think about your own paths for a moment. Have there ever been any times or moments when there were unexpected changes to otherwise what you may have been expecting in a particular routine, especially where an unexpected change that may have turned out to lead to somewhere and help you feel good, like a positive outcome? Or maybe you could well be in the middle of what's known as a difficult detour at this moment, like trying to negotiate an unexpected change in your particular routine of yours. And if that's the case, I hope this idea helps you to feel better.

Stephen McHugh: 8:53

Feel free to reach out if this resonates with you. I'd be interested to hear your stories too. I'm always on the lookout for any of your questions or comments. You can do this by texting the podcast via a link in the episode description.

Stephen McHugh: 9:27

And now, as I conclude this episode, what I'd like to remind you of is life won't always go in the direction we hope it will. For us, to keep going with the flow, even when the river bends after flowing straight, or even slowing right down. We just have to learn how to trust the turns, just to go along with whatever paths, unexpected ones that life may take us on, even when we don't yet see the whole picture.

Stephen McHugh: 10:21

If you wish to stay updated on future episodes and other podcast-related news, you can find a link towards the footer of the homepage of my website, stephensevolution. com. Thank you for being here with me again, if you've made it this far, until next time. I'll see you again on the next episode. .